Prayer . . .

It weirds me out to see how specifically God answers my prayers. Not the intellectual prayers or the ones I feel I should pray. God answers those tearful cries in the night, often fringed with pain. He seems to want me to admit I am week and need specific things that don’t seem necessary for a stronger person. Never will His grace cease to blow me away. I don’t know why I doubt. I suppose I have my own idea of righteousness and I assume that God will cast me into the mold with no forwarning, depriving me instead of letting me grow into discipline. That may be my plan for my life, but His is so much gentler. He desires to give me my heart’s desires. I am week. He doesn’t mind J He wants to be my strength. He wants to give me everything. It’s all so strange still. God, you are truly my best friend and my Loving Father! Let me never ever hesitate to entrust my deepest desires to You.