I drop my kids at daycare after school if their parents have not come for them by 3pm. Yesterday, one came back to help me clean the room. Two more came later. It's amazing to spend time with them outside of our routine. They're such fascinating, complex little people! The other day, waiting for parents, my youngest girl (barely 7) said, "What if God and heaven and hell are not real? What if it is all made up? I have never seen God! How do I know He is real?" I asked her if she had ever seen Africa, and she said no. I said, "But you know Africa is real," and she said, "What if it is not?" There's just so much going on with these kids! I was able to reply to all of her questions, but they keep me intellectually alert. I'm glad I've just read The Weight of Glory. :)

After a good night's sleep and a strong coffee, I'm feeling ok about life right at the moment. But I do want to be a journalist. Maybe God wants the passion to build up so strongly that when it comes time to make the plunge, it will be as natural as the sea washing through a broken levee. That is an analogy in poor taste at this time, but with the storms, it springs to mind first.

If anyone is having any fun next weekend and would like to add a crazy Lebanese into the mix, let me know. I am bored.

You scored as Journalism. You are an aspiring journalist, and you should major in journalism! Like me, you are passionate about writing and expressing yourself, and you want the world to understand your beliefs through writing. English 100% Linguistics 100% Journalism 100% Sociology 100% Anthropology 83% Theater 83% Engineering 83% Art 83% Philosophy 75% Psychology 75% Dance 75% Chemistry 58% Biology 50% Mathematics 50% What is your Perfect Major? created with QuizFarm.com

Back at school, raising my voice, repeating lessons, repeating, repeating, grabbing for coffee, choking down a sandwich between the office and the classroom, rainy recess, kids stay in, trying to stay calm while getting work done at my desk with 24 voices yelling, fingers poking at me, tripping over kids, "teacher?" "teacher?" "TEACHER!" discipline, send them to the office, confiscate recess, unexpected birthday party, not enough cookies to go around, sit down, pay ATTENTION, line up, go home, read over their papers . . . read a paper by H . . .

H, so quiet and obedient, works diligently even when she can't see the board well, raises her hand patiently, listens to the lessons intently . . . H wrote: "I had a hard Christmas. I lost my cat. I miss my cat a lot."

If any one of these children were my own, I would cherish every moment with them. I would give anything to know what goes through these young minds just now experiencing the world as a place of challenge, fear, and sometimes sorrow. Just now, they are discovering the beauty of learning, the life and dimensions of a book, the thrill of a problem solved, the brilliance of understanding, the depths of friendship and the birth or loyalty. I have glimpses all day. The most beautiful glimpses of their expanding minds are usually at the times I am expected to give stern reproach and direct them back to the communal lesson. If only once I could see the potential of these children who are in my care everyday, I would be satisfied. Who are they really? What are their struggles? What is worrying them right now? What will they tell their shrink in forty years? What will they tell their kids about their childhood? Who will they be?

How will they remember me?

Thanks to those of you who read this blog! I'm ashamed to say I don't keep my writing up to par here. I've been fairly dedicated to my other blog (www.xanga.com/sassinit), but I will try to treat this one better, as Blogger's community seems to be growing! I have used Blogger for over four years, and I've had three blogs here, so I like them more anyway. I'll try to write something creative soon!

PS I have just acquired my first Mac (iBook G4) and I am exceedingly proud of it. So instead of shouting it from the rooftops, I'm posting it on Blogger--more people will hear that way.