The other day, when my friend said high school was the pinnacle of his life, it made me sad. I realized that I have never expected any part of my life to be the "pinnacle." In fact, I always expect my life to get progressively better. I suppose we all wish for that.

My friend, I think, was trying to say that, around here, the high schools are good and people love going. But I cannot imagine high school being the best time of your life. Sure, experiences varry, but it's still 4 years of your life that happen very early, if you live a normal life-span.

To have most of your success, friendship, happiness, love seem like it came and went in high school is the #1 most depressing thought to me. That's why sometimes I do encourage the kids at church to think a bit less of high school, calm down, and just enjoy it for what it is.

I told my friend that college was sort of my pinnacle, but then, when I move on from this stage, I might feel the same way about right now. And come to think of it, I loved my time living in San Francisco, and life has gotten progressively better even since college.

How does one live without life getting progressively better? It seems like you'd have to be living without dreams, Or at least without working towards those dreams. That is the #2 most depressing thought ever.

So if not dreams, what are you living for? Duties? Responsibility? Others? Not disappointing people?

I'm not just trying to live for myself so I can be happy, but I will say that if I am not happy, people around me will not be happy--and I am not happy when I'm around people who are obviously not happy.

It's the abundant life that fill Jesus' teaching.

If we can grasp that, perhaps people will calm down, enjoy, dream, live, achieve, and start becoming happy!

WHAT is going ON!!!

I feel so old lately, and of course Valentine's Day doesn't help.

Everyone wants to think they're above Valentine's Day (it's superficial, I don't need a significant other, I have good friends), but nobody really is.

Lately movies, music, interests have not resonated with anyone in my life. Nobody knows me anymore, and I'm getting tired of it. I want to sit and talk to someone who UNDERSTANDS.

Just... understands.

Today, one of the kids at church completely understood Joss Whedon's incredibly corny script writing and how funny it can be when you understand it. And it made me happy to meet a kindred spirit 10 years younger.

But Hien is moving on, and what do you do when you're out of a best friend? What do you do when nobody else knows you at all?

How do you keep meeting people when it always turns out this way?

Is this my life? Will it be a lonely road? Is it ending in greatness or an obscure grave?

Am I thinking outside the box enough to make anything of what God gave me for this life? Or does thinking outside the box demand connection? Maybe we can't reach the top alone.

I need some Joss.